Article

周末心得

我本质上是个宅男,不善交际,内心腼腆。所以在很长一段时间内,我的周末是这样的:

if ( $今天 == ( 周六 || 周日 ))
{
    while ( !$正在睡觉 )
        尝试睡觉();
}

后来,感谢国家,买了一辆车。再后来,感谢国家,买了一台好相机。周末变成了这样:

if ( $今天 == 周六 )
{
    屁憋着出门 ( $天气 , $心情 , $发小状态 );
    echo ‘真是一个有意义的周六!’;
    尝试睡觉();
}
else if ( $今天 == 周日 )
{
    echo ‘妈的,又要上班了!’;
    尝试睡觉();
}

function 屁憋着出门 ( $天气 , $心情 , $发小状态 );
{
    if $天气 == ‘晴’
    {
        echo ‘这是北京吗?啊?!咱都有车了!尊贵的京城车主要出门拍照片!拍照片!’;
        发微薄(‘出门去!’); 睡回笼觉(1个小时); 洗澡(1个小时); 磨蹭(1个小时);
        $参与者[0] = ‘自己’;
        $参与者[1] = ‘不愿意透露姓名的有关人士’;
        echo ‘那咱去哪儿呢到底?啊?!’;
        if ( $心情 > 50 ) {
            $目的地极限 == ‘距北京市200公里’;
        } else {
            $目的地极限 == ‘离家100米’;
        }
        echo ‘咱再叫点人吧!’;
        if ( $发小状态 = ‘在家像疯狗一样对着 Kinect 瞎蹦’ ) {
            $参与者[2] = ‘发小’;
            $参与者[3] = ‘同样不愿意透露姓名的有关人士’;
        } else {
            echo ‘加个屁班啊?再见!’;
        }
        带镜头(50 , 1.4);
        带镜头(28 , 1.8);
        echo ‘是时候买个红圈头了!’;
        出门();
        体验没有驾照却买了一辆车所以只能看着别人开车并抽空瞎指挥的乐趣();
        回家();
        }
    else
    {
        echo ‘住在北京这地方还买车买相机就跟个傻逼似的!’;
    }
}

所以,在一个天气晴好心情美好而且发小和他女朋友又凑巧都有时间的周六,我们去了向往已久的北京野生动物园。

请大家欣赏我的 Flickr 相册!!!猛击!!!

21 Responses to “周末心得”

  1. PS
    February 26, 2011 at 12:35 am #

    火前留名!

  2. February 26, 2011 at 12:41 am #

    宅男和相机确实不搭呀

  3. 饭饭
    February 26, 2011 at 1:29 am #

    留印1

  4. Luchang
    February 26, 2011 at 2:22 am #

    猛击时,记忆回到了大学时代,和UIBE的同学们在北京四处留下脚印。

  5. fivestone
    February 26, 2011 at 8:33 am #

    } catch(Exception e)
    {
    } finally
    {
    echo ‘显得很忧伤’;
    }

  6. ceci
    February 26, 2011 at 11:20 am #

    Great photo…Like the hues…now i know why people with nice camera really like the zoo…animals are so cute even when they re *sad*

  7. HippyXu
    February 28, 2011 at 11:18 pm #

    可爱的变量们…

  8. 梦之源泉
    March 15, 2011 at 10:53 am #

    直接无视 function 屁憋着出门
    太多if了。^_^

  9. 擦,又遇到sb了
    March 16, 2011 at 7:59 am #

    #include(stdio.h)
    {
    printf(“hello,world”)
    }

  10. eva
    April 2, 2011 at 8:41 pm #

    我并不认识你。
    我是通过一个个BLOG连接跳进来的,刚开始看这个名字,我以为你是女生。她曾是我的一个好朋友。后来我们绝交了。
    然后,是因为BLOG右上方的名字,让我想起早在我知道之前就和朋友分手导致一个天神团体结束的男人。这个名字非常的温情脉脉。
    最后,我模糊记得,是因为你的脸和当时BLOG右上方还留着的出生地,如果没记错的话。我曾在某个夏天,飞越三千里,去那里迎接一段恋情的结束。
    我来的时候你BLOG更新的时间已经在一年多以前。在后来一年多的时间里,我想我是来了一个坟而已。
    我不知道为什么会来。
    然后很长的时间后,我忘了这个地方。
    今天忽然发现,坟又打开了。
    过不了几天,我也许又会再次迎接一段恋情的结束。真好笑。都很短,都很蠢。一个人空白的时间远大于所有这些相加的时间。
    你好。再见。

  11. mbtsshoe
    September 19, 2011 at 11:34 am #

    好好的。

  12. iugo
    October 19, 2011 at 9:04 pm #

    什么相机?

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  14. The North Face outlet
    November 2, 2011 at 7:56 pm #

    outlet for women & men

  15. 南京哮喘
    December 2, 2011 at 12:45 pm #

    我第一次见用代码来写日记的,很特别

  16. 小怡加油站
    January 5, 2012 at 8:22 pm #

    可爱的变量已经遗忘了……

  17. vehiclee
    June 18, 2012 at 2:06 pm #

    未定义方法 带镜头

  18. ameng
    July 23, 2012 at 2:11 am #

    哈哈,还是忍不住mark了

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